Pilihan, perlukah?

Seringkali kita berfikir untuk selalu menghindari pilihan. Ujung-ujungnya ada dua pokok pilihan utama, "ya" atau "tidak", bahkan di televisi swasta mulai bermunculan fenomena kuis yang menguji pendirian kita, apakah kita berani mengatakan kata "ya" atau "tidak" Cuman, bahasanya aja yang dibuat beda, contohnya : "Superdeal 2 Milyar" di ANTV atau "Deal or No Deal" di RCTI.

Kita ambil salah satu kasus, misalnya di Superdeal 2 Milyar (SD2M). Peserta kebanyakan yang telah terpilih untuk maju ke babak "penukaran hadiah". Kita bisa melihat peserta yang kelihatannya punya pendirian rapuh, dia akan mendapat zonk atau hadiah bernominal kecil. Setelah itu Nico Siahaan, sang Host SD2M akan membuka hadiah yang paling besar lagi nominalnya dan yang tidak dipilih oleh peserta tersebut. Peserta tadi akhirnya (kebanyakan) gigit jari, atau menyesal mengapa tadi tidak memilih tirai yang satunya lagi ataupun kotak.
Hanya gara-gara bujukan orang atau pilihan dari orang lain.; bukan atas dasar keyakinan, naluri, dan insting. Hadiah yang diniatkan untuk didapatkan, jadi tidak dapat. Walaupun tidak menutup kemungkinan kalau percaya orang lain -bukan atas dasar pendirian diri sendiri- peluang mendapatkan hadiah mobil atau grandprizebesar hanya 1%. Padahal hanya berkata YA (deal) atau tidak (Pilih uang)bisa berakibat fatal.

Hidup tidak bisa lepas dari pilihan, apabila seseorang berpendirian kuat, ia bisa memilih tanpa terpengaruh orang sekitar. Kalau hasilnya buruk, ia belajar untuk menganalisa masalah serta membuatnya untuk lebih baik. Ia sadar bahwa keputusan salah dapat memberinya pengalaman, karena ia hidup dari pengalaman, tanpa pengalaman seseorang tidak akan bisa maju jauh. Apabila keputusannya benar, Ia akan merasa bersyukur, karena yang dipilih itu bukannya faktor "Lucky" atau untung-untungan, ia mengandalkan insting, naluri, strategi, keyakinan dan pertimbangan yang matang. Salam!

What does open source mean?

Most software that you buy or download only comes in the compiled ready-to-run version. Compiled means that the actual program code that the developer created, known as the source code, has run through a special program called a compiler that translates the source code into a form that the computer can understand

It is extremely difficult to modify the compiled version of most applications and nearly impossible to see exactly how the developer created different parts of the program. Most commercial software manufacturers see this as an advantage that keeps other companies from copying their code and using it in a competing product. It also gives them control over the quality and features found in a particular product.

Open source software is at the opposite end of the spectrum. The source code is included with the compiled version and modification or customization is actually encouraged. The software developers who support the open source concept believe that by allowing anyone who's interested to modify the source code, the application will be more useful and error-free over the long term.

To be considered as open source software by the software development industry, certain criteria must be met:


* The program must be freely distributed (It can be part of a package that is sold though, such as Red Hat has done with Linux in the example below).
* Source code must be included.
* Anyone must be allowed to modify the source code.
* Modified versions can be redistributed.
* The license must not require the exclusion of other software or interfere with the operation of other software.

Let's take a look at a real world example of open source software. In 1991, Linus Torvalds, a student at the University of Helsinki in Finland, developed a new operating system based on Minix, a derivative of Unix, which he dubbed Linux. Torvalds released version 0.02 of Linux under the GNU General Public License, which provides a good legal definition of open source software. A lot of people around the world downloaded Linux and began working with it. Many of these users were programmers in their own right and made modifications to the source code that Torvalds had included. Over the next three years, Torvalds received these modified versions from the other programmers and incorporated many of the changes into the baseline version and released Linux version 1.0 in 1994.

A common concern for end-users who wish to use open source software is the lack of a warranty and technical support. Because the software's license encourages modification and customization, it is nearly impossible to support. This is why Red Hat Software, founded in 1994, created the "Official Red Hat Linux" and is able to sell this normally "free" software. The main value that Red Hat adds to the package is a warranty and technical support. For most businesses, the assurance of technical support has been a key factor in the decision to buy Linux instead of simply downloading it for free. In addition to Red Hat, there are several other companies that have packaged Linux, usually with additional software, for resale.

Besides Linux, Mozilla (Netscape browser core), Apache (Web server), PERL (Web scripting language) and PNG (graphics file format) are all examples of very popular software that is based on open source.

What's the problem with Microsoft Word?

In the last two months alone, at least four major security flaws involving Microsoft Word have come to light. All are "zero day" flaws, meaning Microsoft and security organizations became aware of them at the same time that destructive hackers became aware of them. In many "zero day" cases, it's the exploitation of the flaw that brings it to the attention of the software companies; in other cases, the software companies announce the flaw and hackers immediately take advantage of it before a patch can be released. The strange thing about the latest Word problems is that almost eight weeks after the first one hit the news because it was exploited by attackers, Microsoft still hasn't released a patch to fix it.





The first in this string of security holes popped up in early December. This flaw affects computers running Word 2000, 2002 and 2003; Word 2004 for Mac and Word 2004 version X for Mac; Word Viewer 2003; and Microsoft Works 2004, 2005 and 2006. An attacker hides a piece of code in a Word document and puts it on a Web site for download or sends it out as an e-mail attachment. When a user downloads or opens the document, the attacker can remotely control the user's computer and execute a wide array of codes under the user's own login. This flaw came to Microsoft's attention on December 5, 2006, when people started reporting attacks.

A second, previously unknown flaw started to draw attention just a week later, this one also allowing a remote attacker to take control of a user's PC. According to Microsoft, though, this flaw exploits a entirely different security hole -- one that opens when Word undergoes a specific error. Apparently, this attack doesn't require a user to download a malicious file; it only requires the Word program on the person's computer to experience this error, at which point an attacker can enter the system and run malicious code. It affects Word 2000, 2002 and 2003 and Word Viewer 2003.

Security experts have attributed these two security holes to memory-corruption flaws in the Word programs. Days later, a third flaw was revealed. This one also allows for remote access and control of a user's machine and has been tied to a buffer-overflow problem in Word. It came to public attention when a software expert called "Disco Johnny" published a proof-of-concept code on the Web that showed how a malicious hacker could exploit it, essentially providing instructions for running an attack in addition to showing Microsoft it has yet another problem. And about five weeks later, on January 25, a fourth security hole became the subject of a malicious attack that begins when a user opens a rigged Word file sent as an e-mail attachment and has similar results to the previous attacks: Remote access and control of an entire system if it's running Word 2000. If the computer is running Word 2003 or Word XP, it only crashes the computer, as opposed to opening it up to remote control.

These four issues are only the latest in a series of attacks exploiting previously undiscovered flaws in a wide array of Microsoft Office applications. In September 2006, hackers started exploiting another zero-day Word flaw, this one only affecting Word 2000. A user had to open an infected Word 2000 document using the Word 2000 program in order for the virus, MDropper.Q, to drop a piece of code in the user's PC. This allowed a remote attacker to take control of the infected PC. Security sources report that this flaw still has not been patched, almost five months later. Microsoft has, however, patched several of the flaws involving other Office programs, including security holes in versions of PowerPoint and Excel.

Since no security patches have been released for the Word flaws, Microsoft recommends installing multiple layers of security software and updating the versions vigilantly. Beyond that, we can only use the wariness we've become accustomed to when opening attachments or downloading files, with an extension into a traditionally safer area: Now, if it ends with .doc, don't touch it unless you know and trust the source.

For more information on Microsoft security holes and related topics, check out the following links:

* How Computer Viruses Work
* How E-mail Works
* How PCs Work

* CNET News.com: Attack code published for third Word flaw - Dec. 14, 2006
* McAfee Virus Information
* NewsFactor: Microsoft Leaves Critical Word Flaws Unpatched - Jan. 10, 2007

Sources

* Evers, Joris. "Another Word zero-day bug used in attacks." CNET News.com. Jan. 25, 2007.
http://news.zdnet.com/2100-1009_22-6153562.html?tag=nl.e589
* Evers, Joris. "No fix yet for Word 2000 flaw." CNET News.com. Sept. 12, 2006.
http://news.zdnet.com/2100-1009_22-6114932.html?tag=nl
* Evers, Joris. "Word hole exploited in zero-day attacks." CNET News.com. Dec. 5, 2006.
http://news.zdnet.com/2100-1009_22-6141221.html?tag=nl
* Kawamoto, Dawn. "Attack code published for third Word flaw." CNET News.com. Dec. 14, 2006.
http://news.zdnet.com/2100-1009_22-6143853.html?tag=nl
* Kawamoto, Dawn. "Second zero-day flaw found in Word." CNET News.com. Dec. 11, 2006.
http://news.zdnet.com/2100-1009_22-6142531.html?tag=nl
* Kawamoto, Dawn. "Word flaw hit with zero-day attack." CNET News.com. Sept. 5, 2006.
http://news.zdnet.com/2100-1009_22-6112265.html?tag=nl

How Windows Vista Works

The first version of Microsoft Windows hit the market in 1983. But unlike today's versions of Windows, Windows 1.0 was not an operating system (OS). It was a graphical user interface that worked with an existing OS called MS-DOS. Version 1.0 didn't look much like newer versions, either -- not even Windows 3.0, which many people think of as the first real version of Windows. Its graphics were simpler and used fewer colors than today's user interfaces, and its windows could not overlap.





Windows has changed considerably since then. In the last 20 years, Microsoft has released numerous full-fledged versions of the operating system. Sometimes, newer versions are significantly different from older ones, such as the change from Windows 3.1 to Windows 95. Other new releases have seemed more like enhancements or refinements of the older ones, such as the multiple consumer versions of the OS released from 1995 to 2001.

Microsoft's newest version of its operating system is Windows Vista. For many users, upgrading to Vista won't seem as dramatic as the upgrade from 3.1 to Windows 95. But Windows Vista has a number of new features, both in the parts that you can see and the parts that you can't.

At its core, Windows Vista is still an operating system. It has two primary behind-the-scenes jobs:

* Managing hardware and software resources, including the processor, memory, storage and additional devices
* Allowing programs to work with the computer's hardware

Thank You
Thanks to Jason Caudill for his assistance with this article.
If all goes well, this work is usually invisible to the user, but it's essential to the computer's operation. You can learn about these tasks in more detail in How Operating Systems Work.

But when many people think of operating systems, they think of the portion they can see -- the graphical user interface (GUI). The GUI is what people use to interact with the hardware and software on the computer. In Windows systems, features like the Start menu, the recycle bin and the visual representations of files and folders are all part of the GUI.

Windows Vista's GUI is a 3-D interface called Windows Aero. Of the four editions of Windows Vista, three -- Home Premium, Business and Ultimate -- support Windows Aero. Home Basic, the most scaled-down edition of the OS, uses a less graphics-intensive GUI instead of Aero. The other editions can also use this basic GUI, so people with older computers that can't support lots of 3-D graphics can still upgrade to Vista.

We'll take a closer look at the Aero GUI and other Vista features next.

Microsoft's Web site has more information on which features each edition includes.

Additional Editions
In addition to the four primary editions of Windows Vista, there are two editions for special markets. Windows Vista Enterprise is designed for very large businesses. Windows Vista Starter is a basic Vista OS for use in emerging markets, such as developing countries.

How Spam Works

Many of us receive dozens of spam messages daily.
Most of us get spam every day. Some of us get a little, and some of us get a lot, but if you have an e-mail account it is always there. Here is the example




Subject: Adobe

Suppose we tell you that you could really lose up to 82% of your unwanted body fat and keep it off in just a few months, would you be interested? We certainly hope so! Please visit our web site - Click here!

Obviously this is spam, yet it made it through the spam filters and I opened it because the subject line made it unknowable whether it was spam or not.

Spam is incredibly annoying, especially in large quantities. If you have a public e-mail address you can receive hundreds of spam messages for every legitimate message that arrives. Even with good filters, some of the spam makes it through. And filters can sometimes delete messages that you really do want to receive. Spam is free speech run amok.

Where does all of this spam e-mail (also known as "unsolicited commercial e-mail") come from? Why is there so much of it? Is there any way to stop it? In this article, we will answer these questions and many others as we take a dive into the sea of spam.

Spam is a huge problem for anyone who gets e-mail. According to Business Week magazine:

In a single day in May [2003], No. 1 Internet service provider AOL Time Warner (AOL ) blocked 2 billion spam messages -- 88 per subscriber -- from hitting its customers' e-mail accounts. Microsoft (MSFT), which operates No. 2 Internet service provider MSN plus e-mail service Hotmail, says it blocks an average of 2.4 billion spams per day. According to research firm Radicati Group in Palo Alto, Calif., spam is expected to account for 45% of the 10.9 trillion messages sent around the world in 2003.

One of the problems with spam, and the reason why there is so much of it, is that it is so easy to create.

spam e-mail

You could easily become a spammer yourself. Let's say that you have a recipe from your grandmother for the best blueberry muffins ever created. A friend suggests that you sell the recipe for $5.

As in, the Meat?
Where did the name "spam" come from? See Templetons.com to find out!
You decide that your friend might be on to something, so you send an e-mail to the 100 people in your personal e-mail address book with the subject line, "These Blueberry Muffins Have Been Described as Heaven -- You Can Have the Recipe for $5!" Your e-mail contains a link to your blueberry muffin Web site. As a result of your 100 e-mails, you get two orders and make $10.

"Wow!" you think, "It cost me nothing to send those 100 e-mails, and I made $10. If I sent 1,000 e-mails I could make $100. If I sent a million e-mails I could make $100,000! I wonder where I could get a million e-mail addresses... Ok, you can think alone..."

How can a Windows virus end up on an iPod?

In October 2006, iPod ran into a bit of a snag regarding its Windows support, considered by many in the industry to be crucial to iPod's near-complete dominance in the portable media player market. One might think that because iPods are Apple devices, they're not susceptible to the viruses that plague Microsoft's Windows operating system. Apparently, not so. If you bought an iPod video between September 12, 2006 and October 18, 2006, there is, according to Apple, a 1 percent chance it contains a worm called RavMonE.exe.





The worm is of the sort that opens a "back door" on a PC so that a remote user can start controlling the infected computer. The iPod shuffles and iPod nanos shipped after September 12 are not infected with the malware; the worm does nothing to harm the iPod device itself; and people who only connect the iPod video to a Mac running Mac OS X will never activate the worm. The malware is in the Windows-support programs that live on the iPod.

The worm jumps into action when you connect an infected iPod video to a machine running Windows that is set to automatically run iPod applications when it detects a connected iPod. So the easiest way to make sure your PC doesn't get infected is simply to disable the autorun/autoplay capabilities in your iTunes interface. That way, you'll be prompted to approve each application the iPod software wants to run. If your computer asks you to run something called RavMonE.exe, also known as Win32.RJump.a, Troj/Bdoor-DIJ, WORM_SIWEOL.B, Backdoor.Rajump and numerous other names, just say no. In fact, it's probably best to put e-mail rules into effect and just say no to running anything that looks unfamiliar.

So how does this type of thing happen? Apple Vice President Greg Joswiak explains in a CIO Tech Informer article:

As you’re probably aware, the majority of iPod sales are made to Windows users, so we have some Windows terminals on our production line. We discovered that one of these computers was propagating this virus.

The machine that was doing the infecting was apparently the last Windows machine on that particular production line -- the quality-control computer.

If you do end up connecting an infected iPod to your PC, your anti-virus software should be able to detect it, so hopefully you won't get infected. If you do get infected, running a standard virus-detection-and-removal program should be able to clean your machine. Splotlighting News recommends that all Windows users who have connected a potentially infected iPod to their machine run one of these:

* Microsoft Live OneCare Safety Scanner
* Microsoft Live OneCare
* McAfee
* Symantec Norton Anti-Virus

Apple says that all iPods shipped as of October 18, 2006, are free of malware.

For more information on iPods, viruses and related topics, check out the following links:

* Spotlighting News: The Risks Of W32/RJump.worm Found On iPod
* MySA.com: The Mac Guy: Windows on a Mac isn't any more secure than it is on a PC
* InternetNews.com: Apple Blames Microsoft for iPod Virus - October 18, 2006

by Julia Layton

How Pizza can be good for you?

If you eat pizza all the time, chances are you're not overly concerned with your health. And if you are a healthy eater who turns to pizza as an occasional junk-food splurge, you may experience some guilt after you've downed a few (or five or six) slices of cheesy, empty-carb heaven. But soon, that could all change. Sort of.




Food chemists at the University of Maryland have been looking into ways to boost the antioxidant content of wheat-based foods. Two components in wheat -- bran and endosperm -- are rich in antioxidants, nutrients that can prevent cell damage in the body by inhibiting the oxidation process. Research has shown that antioxidants help avoid the effects of free radicals in the body, which are charged particles that go around stealing electrons from atoms, causing cell damage that has been linked to diseases like cancer and heart disease. The body has natural antioxidant defenses against free radicals, but those natural defenses can be overrun. Adding antioxidants to your diet can help those defenses fight back more successfully (see How Antioxidants Work to learn more). So that's the idea behind boosting antioxidants to make foods more healthy.

So how can pizza help prevent heart disease? This concept requires disconnecting the dough from what goes on top of it. It's the dough that can be made antioxidant-rich -- but only if it's whole-wheat dough. Regular pizza dough won't work.

What the researchers did is take various types of whole-grain wheat dough and mess around with three factors: fermenting time (when the dough is left to rise); baking temperature and baking time. They found that increasing each factor increased the levels of antioxidants in the dough. Baking the dough for 14 minutes instead of seven minutes increased antioxidants up to 80 percent. Higher baking temperatures, going from 400 F (204 C) to 550 F (285 C), raised antioxidant levels up to 60 percent. And extending the fermenting time from the usual 18 hours to 48 hours boosted antioxidants up to 100 percent. The exact results depended on the type of flour and the antioxidant test the researchers applied. But overall, the results were very good for a healthier pizza dough. The scientists believe antioxidants levels will really skyrocket if pizza makers implement all of the increases, although it's unclear how a pizza won't burn if it's baked both hotter and longer.

No one is sure exactly why the higher temperatures and longer bake times increase antioxidant levels in the dough. But they believe the longer fermenting time boosts antioxidants because the yeast has more time to carry out chemical reactions that cause changes in the dough, which leads to the release of more latent antioxidants as molecular bonds are reorganized in the fermenting process.

Of course, there are a couple of issues standing in the way of "pizza as health food." The first one is the fact that people put stuff on top of the pizza dough. Tomato sauce is not a big problem, but cheese is -- cheese is a high-fat food. And not just fat, but saturated fat. That's why it tastes so good. And stuff like pepperoni and sausage? Artery clogging, thigh-expanding foods. So as soon as you put that stuff on your antioxidant-rich, whole-wheat pizza dough, the good effects of the antioxidants are completely canceled out by the bad effects of the cheesy, fatty, processed-meaty goodness.

On the other hand, if you put some reduced fat cheese, spinach and low-fat turkey sausage on that antioxidant-rich dough, you could actually be eating a healthy meal that looks and tastes a lot like pizza.

The other thing blocking pizza's path to health is that almost nobody makes pizza dough with whole-wheat flour. Whole-wheat-flour dough tastes different than refined-flour dough, and the general public seems to prefer the latter. The researchers think you might see some increase in antioxidants in regular pizza dough using the three methods they studied, but it would be a small increase at best. Refining wheat takes out most of the bran and endosperm, which doesn't leave many antioxidants left to boost.

The University of Maryland chemists say the pizza industry is not funding their research. They decided to take on pizza as opposed to, say, pita bread, because it's wheat-based and extremely popular. If you can make pizza a healthy food, public health would actually benefit significantly. There are similar things happening in the soft-drink industry. Coke and Pepsi are both hitting the market with vitamin-fortified soft drinks in 2007. But they're not calling them "soft drinks." These new products are "sparkling beverages." And there's a Snickers protein bar on store shelves, not in the candy bar aisle, but in the energy bar aisle. Healthier junk food is an interesting trend, and some support the industry's attempt to stop killing people slowly. Others insist that food that's actually healthy to start with is a much better option.

For more information on pizza, antioxidants and related topics, check out the following links:

* How Antioxidants Work
* How Fats Work
* Could I lose weight just by eating slower?

* CNN.com: Pizza as health food? - Mar. 26, 2007
* The Detroit News: 'Healthy' soda pop to include vitamins - Mar. 7, 2007
* ScienceDaily: Chemists Create Healthier Pizza By Boosting Antioxidants In Dough - Mar. 27, 2007

Sources

* Atkins, William. "Healthy pizza dough? It's in the prep work and materials!" iTWire. Mar. 27, 2007.
http://www.itwire.com.au/content/view/10857/1066/
* "Chemists Create Healthier Pizza By Boosting Antioxidants In Dough." ScienceDaily. Mar. 27, 2007.
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/03/070326181611.htm
* Martin, Andrew. "'Healthy' soda pop to include vitamins." The Detroit News. Mar. 7, 2007.
http://www.detnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070307/ LIFESTYLE03/703070418/1040
* "Pizza as health food?" CNN.com. Mar. 26, 2007.
http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/03/26/ pizza.antioxidants.reut/index.html
By : Julia Layton

Yuk, bikin Blog Mobile sendiri..!

Pengin buat situs WAP sendiri ? Lumayanlah buat ajang cari teman..! Layanan ini kayak friendster gitu lho..! Hmm.. menarik juga yaa..! Yuk tengok cara buatnya, gampang koq.! Saya bagi menajdi 3 segmen

-Register di Mobileplay-
Perlu diperhatikan, link diatas tidak ikut dalam referal program koq..! Ok, to the point aja..
Buka mobileplay.com di PC
klik link "Join Now"
Isi sesuai dengan perintah pada bagian "Profile info" dan "Account Info", lalu klik "I agree"
Masukkan foto anda beserta deskripsi singkat tentang profil anda
(Kalau anda amati , akan terlihat 2 jendela, yang satu berupa formulir isian profil, yang satu berupa tiruan Handphone / Iphone, hasil update-an profil itu dapat terlihat di Iphone
Masukkan info tentang apa yang anda suka atau tidak suka.
Sukses, blog mobile anda telah selesai dibuat.!
-Mengedit Profil-
Buka Mobileplay.com, klik My profile. LAlu edit profil anda.
Mobileplay juga menyediakan fitur download, anda bisa menyimpan ringtone dengan asumsi file yang akan anda Upload kurangdari 4 MB
-Tes Blog-
Ini nih yang paling asyik, tes blog-mobile kita. Caranya buka browser, masukkan alamat situs anda dan jreng..! Jadi dech mobile-blog anda..!
Selain itu, Mobileplay juga menyediakan fasilitas-fasilitas tertentu.
Yuk, saling sharing tentang Mobile-blog apabila anda semua telah mencoba nya..!

Warung Cina : Tempat Cari Inspirasi

Kadang ide itu datang tak diduga-duga, pergi juga tidak di duga-duga; easy come, easy going. Pada saat yang dibutuhkan (kebanyakan nich) busyeet... Ndak muncul! Kalau lagi, misalnya Relax wah, pasti langsung nongol. Cuman ide ini yang ngegemesin datangpada saat kita menghadap maha kuasa (Bukannya mati Lho..)

Nah menyikapi hal diatas, ada tempat nich yang cocok buat cari 'n gali ide. Yup, di Warung Cina.Kadang sih kita boleh kok bawa lembar kertas. Warung Cina ini jelasnya suasananya sepi. Sehingga memungkinkan kita untuk menangkap ide dan mengolah ide tersebut. Anda tau maksud saya Warung Cina itu? Tiap rumah punya lho..! Anda mungkin bertanya-tanya, apa Warung Cina itu dapat menyembulkan ide gara-gara yang punya itu orang cina yang cantik, ato perabotannya yang exotic? Jawabnya coba dech singkatin apa itu "Warung Cina", Ya, WC...

The Power of Love

Ada gula ada semut. Ada cinta maka manusia ada. Cinta itu manis bagai gula. Karena cinta, dunia begitu indah. Dalamnya lautan dan luasnya samudra menjadi tak berarti karena cinta. Cinta membuat manusia membangun gedung pencakar langit serta mampu menembus bumi. Karena cinta juga manusia mampu membua karya spektakuler yang dikenang masa. Cinta juga yang mempengaruhi manusia membangun sebuah peradaban dan menciptakan karyaq-karya (penemuan-penemuan) monumental. Cinta membuat semuanya menjadi mungkin. Itulah Cinta yang jadi rebutan manusia sepanjang masa.

Cinta merubah pribadi seseorang dalam sekejap mata. Cinta membuat muka masam jadi berseri, kantong tipis serasa tebal, dan penakut menadi pemberani. Cinta yang menyebabkan seseorang menjadi kuat ditengah himpitan hidup yang menderita. Itulah cinta ibarat bensin yang mampu menggerakkan bensin. Ibarat angin yang mampu bergerak super elastis. Ibarat matahari yang mampu menerangi alam semesata. Cinta adalah nafas kehidupan.
Tapi karena cinta manusia merintihy dan menangisi hidup sepanjang masa. Atas nama cinta seseorang tega mengakhiri hidup secara tragis; terlentang diatas rel kereta apai, meminum racun da menjerat lehernya sendiri. Cinta meledakkan peperangan dimana-mana Atas nama cinta seseorang tega membunuh sesama dan memicu kerusuhan yang menghanguskan ribuan rumah. Itulah cinta yang menadi kambing hitam.
Sepanjang sejarah manusia, cerita-cerita yang menggambarkan tentang cinta menghiasi lembaran sejarah bahkan tak jarang menjadi sebuah cerita yang melegenda. Hal ini membuktikan betapa kedudukan cinta meemiliki peranan yang sangat penting dalam kehidupan manusia. Cinta memang milik manusia.
Tapi tidak sembarang manusia bisa memiliki cinta. Manusia yang sehat dan berakal saja yang dapa merasakan cinta. Manusia gia (dalam arti sebenarnya) tidak akan pernah meraskan cinta. Begitu pula manusia yang GILA HARTA, KEDUDUKAN, dan gila SEKS TIDAK AKAN PERNAH merasakan cinta.
Hidup tanpa cinta akan SIA-SIA, tanpa cinta berarti kematian dan kematian tanpa cinta adalah kerugian besar. Bahkan Muhamad Iqbal, sang penyair komdang dari Pakistan, mengungkapkan bahwa jika tiada cinta agama dan segala aturannya ibarat kumpulan bayangan bisu. Namun sebaliknya, jika diperlukan dengan cinta, ia akan menjadi pengatur di dunia semesta. Cinta tak mengenal cepat atau lambat, tak megenal jauh dan dekat, centa membuat gunung selembut salju dan membuat jantung berdetak cepat.

Pendengar yang baik? Siapa Takut!

Secara kodrati, manusia terlahir dengan dua telinga, dua tangan, serta dua kaki dan hanya mempunyai satu mulut saja. Ini mengandung makna bahwa seyogyanya manusia lebih banyak mendengar dan berbuat/bertindak dari pada berbicara. Letak telinga kita dikepala, maknanya adalah agar kita mendengar secara sadar, penuh perhatian dan memulau proses nalar atau berfikir.

Meski memiliki telinga yang normal, tapi tidak semua orang mampu menjadi pendengar yang baik bagi oang lain.
Kesadaran kita menggunakan telinga untuk mendengar hal-hal baik serta mendengarkan secara baik pembicaraan orang lain, adalah bukti syukur kita kepada Allah, serta merupakan wujud tanggung jawab bahwa akan ada pertanggungjawaban dari telinga kita atas sedala yang telah didengarnya, dihari kiamat kelak. Dan ini adalah salah satu bekal bagi seseorang untuk dapat menjadi seorang pendengar yang baik.

Untuk menjadi seorang pendengar yang baik, memang tidak mudah dan perlu banyak latihan. Tapi hal ini bukan sesuatu yang tidak mungkin. Pengelolaan cara mendengar (manajemen mendengar) sangat bermanfaat untuk menghindarkan seseorang dari mendengar yang tidak sepantasnya, mendengarkan secara tidak simpati tanpa etika yang menimbulkan perasaan tidak nyaman dan aman bagi lawan bicara kita, menghindari hal-hal yang tidak terpuji, sesuatu yang sia-sia atau berdosa, serta terjabak dalam ghibah atau fitnah.

Mendengar secara efektif terjadi bila informasi (pesan) dipndahkan dari sumber informasi kepada penerima dan mendapatkan umpan balik (respon) yang diharapkan. Keberhasilan menangkap pesan yang disampaikan tergantung pada sfektifitas dalam mendengar yang dipengaruhi oleh faktor-faktor: sumber pesan, kondisi lawan bicara, lingkungan, kendala pendengaran dan reaksi penerimaan.
Hal-hal yang harus diperhatikan oleh pendengar untuk mendengar secara efektif antara lain adalah: berfkir terbuka, memperhatikan gerak-gerik pembicara, memfokuskan perhatian pada informasi, siap mental dan fisik untuk mendengar. Untuk mampu menjadi pendengar yang baik dan berhasil, maka hal-hal yang perlu diperhatikan adalah: penuh minat dan perhatian, memusatkan perhatian, menghargai pembicara, dan mendekatkan posisi pada pembicara.

Ketidamampuan seseorang dalam mendengarkan orang lain, berpeluang merusak hubungan sosial. Banyak orang merasa tidak dicintai, dihargai, diperhatikan bila tida didengarkan atau mendapat respon/tanggapan yang baik atas pembicaraannya, apalagi pembicaraan tentang dirinya sendiri. harus sip untuk mnjadi orang yang pandai dan memberi alasan dan kesempatan kepada orang lain untuk berbicara tentang dirinya. Sanbat bermanfaat untuk seseorang untuk memberi umpan balik, kita harus paham pada pembicaraan orang lain (bertanya lebih jauh, menjawab pertanyaan, memberi tanggapan dll). Untuk memberikan umpan balik, kita harus paham apa yang disampaikan pembicara. Untuk menjadi pendengar yang baik, Dr. Setiawan Budi Utomo (anggota dewan syariah nasional MUI) merumuskan beberapa prinsip etika mendengar “Double Special” berikut:
1. Smart and Secret, yaitu cerdas menangkap dan memilh pesan atau pembicaraan serta mampu menjaga rahasia bila diperlukan.
2. Peaceful and Pleasureable, yaitu bersikap penuh damai, tenang, menyenangkan dan menghibur.
3. Emphaty dan Effective, yaitu sikap empatik, memahami situasi dan kondisi yang dihadapi dan mampu menangkap pesan secara efektif.
4. Charming and Cooperative, bersikap atraktif (menarik), ramah, santun serta mampu bekerjasama dalam menghadapi persoalan yang didiskusikan.
5. Inspirational and Interactive, yaitu mampu menjadi sumber inspirasi dan ilham bagi pembicara untuk mengungkapkan persoalan serta dapat menghidupkan suasana dialog.
6. Appreciative and Analyctic, yaitu menghargai dan penuh perhatian tanpa mengurangi kemampuan kritis analisis untuk meneliti pesan seksama. (kebenaran pembicaraan orang0).
7. Loyal and Listening, yaitu senantiasa menunjukkan kesetiaan sebagai teman bicara dan memiliki kepedulian serta tekad untuk menjadi pendengar setia yang aktif dan responsif kapanpun dibutuhkan.

Sedangkan menurut Imam Al Ghazali dalam Ihya’ Ulumuddin, Kitab As-sama’, menerangkan bahwa untuk mendegarkan dengan baik seseorang harus memperhatikan tiga unsur utama yakni: waktu, tempat dan kawan bicara yang tepat.
Pengelolaan (manajemen) mendengar sangat penting dalam kehidupan, agar dalam setiap interaksi/komunikasi bisa berjalan dengan baik dan lancar. Dan ini akan membawa kita memiliki pengaruh yang positif terhadap orang lain. Dengan ketrampilan kita mendengar, orang lain akan merasa berharga, bernilai, dan diperhatikan yang akhirnya membuat orang senang/bahagia. Suatu amalan yang mulia bagi kita, bila mampu membuat orang lain demikian.

Cemas..? Hmmm...

Kecemasan
Sikap cemas merupakan respon (tanggapan) seseorang baik dalam bentuk pikiran, tindakan dan kondisi emosional terhadap peristiwa tertentu yang mungkin terjadi atau dianggap akan terjadi dalam hidupnya. Rasa cemas ini biasanya, bersumber dari perasaan khawatir terhadap sesuatu. Ia dapat timbul karena adanya masalah besar, hal-hal penting atau sesuatu yang memang nyata-nyata akan terjadi. Namun terkadang rasa cemas justru muncul akibat masalah kecil, sepele atau khayalan saja.
Cemas tidak selalu buruk.

Lintasan pikiran seperti “Bagaimana kalau …”, “jangan-jangan nanti …”, bagaimana mungkin aku bisa …”, dan lain sebagainya pada dasarnya merupakan refleksi (pantulan) kecemasan dalam diri seseorang. Perasaan cemas akan mengakibatkan perasaan takut, ragu-ragu, tersingkir, tegang, terguncang, pesimis, emosional, ketus, pasif dan sebagainya. Rasa cemas dalam jangka waktu yang pendek wajar dialami siapapun dan bukanlah suatu peristiwa yang membuat kita khawatir.
Dalam batas tertentu rasa cemas yang wajar bermanfaat untuk mengantisipasi terjadinya hal-hal yang tidak diinginkan. Seperti rasa cemas tidak lulus ujian, dapat membuat siswa lebih banyak belajar agar tidak mengalami kegagalan. Contoh lain, rasa cemas akan siksa neraka, akan menyebabkan seseorang berhati-hati dalam bertindak dan menjaga diri dari maksiat.
Rasa cemas baru akan menjadi masalah ketika terjadi terus menerus atau berulang-ulang. Sehingga menjadi “kebiasaan” bahkan semacam “fobia”. Kecemasan semacam ini dapat menurunkan kualitas hidup dan kemampuan untuk menikmati hidup. Karena itu diperlukan kemampuan untuk mengendalikan kecemasan agar tidak sampai menimbulkan hal-hal yang negatif.
Penyebab Kecemasan
Salah satu penyebab umum yang menjadikan seseorang merasa ecmas adalah faktor “kebahagiaan dan keinginan”. Khwatir tidak memperoleh kebahagiaan atau suatu kondisi tidak seperti yang diinginkan dapat membuat orang merasa cemas. Di samping faktor kesehatan, masa depan, keuangan, persahabatan/pergaulan, bahkan kecemasan itu sendiri dapat menimbulkan rasa cemas.
Akibat Cemas
Rasa cemas selain mempengaruhi psikologis seperti gelisah, terguncang, sulit tidur, cepat marah, mudah menangis, tertekan, khawatir, mengasingkan diri, minder (rendah diri) dan sebagainya, juga menimbulkan gangguan fisik seperti rasa tegang pada otot, mual, diare, sembelit, timbul bintik merah pada kulit, gatal, sakit perut.
Kecemasan sebagai bahan evaluasi
Kecemasan sebenarnya dapat juga digunakan sebagai bahan evaluasi terhadap kekurangan diri. Apa kekurangan saya sehingga saya harus merasa cemas seperti ini? Pertanyaan ini mungkin dapat membantu mengubah rasa cemas semata-mata, menjadi proses evaluasi diri. Hal-hal yang menimbulkan rasa cemas sebaiknya diaggap sebagai sebuah tantangan, sehingga kita menjadi termotivasi untuk berupaya mengurangi (meminimalisir) kekurangan kita, sekaligus berusaha mengatasi tantangan. Keuntungan lainnya dengan bersikap rasional kita dapat melihat persoalan secara obyektif, realistis dan proporsional. Sehingga tiak jatuh pada buruk sangka dan menyiksa diri dengan “bayangan seram” yang kita ciptakan sendiri.
Mengatasi kecemasan
Bertawakal dan berbaik sangka pada Allah sangat membantu seseorang dalam mengatasi kecemasan. Dalam bukunya “The Power of Positive Thingkin” Norman Vicent Peale memberikan 10 kiat mengatasi kecemasan:
1. Katakan pada diri sendiri bahwa kecemasan hanyalah kebiasaan mental yang sangat buruk dan anda yakin dapat mengatasinya dengan bantuan Tuhan.
2. Anda menjadi orang yang cemas karena mempraktekkan kecemasan. Sebaliknya anda dapat bebas dari kecemasan dengan mempraktekkan kebiasaan iman yang melahirkan ketenangan batin.
3. Keimanan dapat ditumbuhkan dengan melakukan latihan.
4. Berdo’alah dengan formula “Saya menyerahkan hari ini, hidup saya, orang-orang yang saya kasihi, pekerjaan saya ke tangan Tuhan. Tidak ada bahaya di tnagan Tuhan, yang ada hanya kebaikan. Apapun yang terjadi, apapun hasilnya, jika saya berada di tangan Tuhan, ini adalah kehendak Tuhan dan ini baik”
5. Biasakanlah mengucapkan hal-hal yang positif seperti “Hari ini Insya Allah akan menyenangkan.” “Dengan bantuan Tuhan saya pasti bisa!”
6. Jangan berpartisipasi dalam percakapan yang penuh nuansa kekhawatiran. Tambahkanlah muatan iman dan keyakinan dalam setiap percakapan anda.
7. Salah satu penyebab anda khwatir, cemas adalah karena anda dijejali dengan ketakutan, kekalahan, kegagalan dan rasa murung. Netralkanlah segala pikiran negatif tersebut dengan menghayati kitab suci.
8. Binalah persahabatan dengan orang yang penuh harapan dan keyakinan.
9. Bantulah orang lain mengatasi kecemasannya, niscaya anda akan terbantu mengatasi kecemasan diri sendiri.
10. Bangunlah perasaan kebersamaan dengan Tuhan nicaya anda akan hidup dengan penuh keyakinan dan harapan.

Sedangkan menurut Dale Carnegie dalam bukunya “How stop worrying and start living” menawarkan tujuh cara untuk mengembangkan dan memupuk sikap mental untuk hidup tentram dan bahagia yaitu:
1. Isi hati dengan pikiran tentang kedamaian, keberanian, kesehatan serta harapan sebab “hidup kita dibentuk oleh pikiran kita sendiri”.
2. Jangan menaruh dendam pada musuh, sebab bila kita berbuat demikian, kita akan lebih menderita daripada mereka. Jangan sekali-kali membuang waktu sedetikpun untuk merisaukan orang yang tidak kita senangi.
3. Biasakan hidup ikhlas tanpa pamrih kepada makhluk dan mengharapkan kasih sayang Tuhan agar kita tidak merasa cemas dengan ucapan terimakasih dan balas jasa.
4. Kenang dan ingat selalu keberkahan dan kemujuran yang anda terima, lupakan segala kemalangan anda.
5. Jangan meniru orang lain, jadilah diri sendiri dan berbuatlah sesuai kepribadian anda secara wajar. Sebab iri hati berbarti tolol dan meniru orang lain berbarti bunuh diri.
6. Ambil keuntungan dan hikmah sebanyak-banyaknya dari nasig buruk anda serta ubahlah minus menjai plus.
7. Lupakan kesusahan yang menimpa kita dengan membahagiakan orang lain.

Selain apa yang disampaikan Norman Vincent Peale dan Dale Carnegie diatas, maka kiat-kiat mereduksi kecemasan berikut bisa dilaksanakan apabila menghadapi suatu keadaan yang membuat kita cemas, antara lain:
1. Hadapi kenyataan, kita harus berani mengakui bahwa kita sedang cemas, tidak perlu menutupi diri dengan dalih “semua baik-baik saja”, nggak ada masalah …..”. Dan sebagainya.
2. Kenali penyebab cemas, untuk memudahkan kita mengambil langkah-langkah yang tepat.
3. Dekatkan diri pada allah, dampak dari cemas salah satunya adalah hati yang tidak tenang. Dengan ibadah, sholat, baca kitab suci, dzikir, maka hati akan menjadi tenang.
4. Relaksasi.
5. Curahkan perasaan (curhat) jangan dipendam.
6. Tulis uneg-uneg dalam buku (agenda, diary dsb), jika hal-hal yang mengganjal tidak mungkin disampaikan pada orang lain.